So many years just a different day
Hopeless existence, I’ve lost my way
Feeling so low, lost everything inside
Watching my life as it passes me by
I once lived a life with promise and hope
Till I lost all my will and forgot how to cope
No matter how I try, I can’t shake my past
My dreams were taken and smashed
Slowly time passes, loneliness is my home
Now I live my life, so useless and alone
Ive tried and I’ve tried just to break free
I don’t even care what becomes of me
Fighting for life at the end of the rope
Nothing to lose, you’ve lost all hope
No one will help a person so wrong
No one will care when you are gone
You lived your life without having a care
Robbing and stealing causing despair
You always take, with nothing to give
Now you’ll die the way you lived
It was all bound to catch up one day
With all the people that you betrayed
Now its too late, too late for remorse
Fate has caught up and taken its course
You should have thought about your life
Given back to others and done what’s right
Now it’s too late and your wondering why
No one will care when it’s your turn to die.
(Source: http)
If I was to say sorry, would I be forgiven for my life?
If I was to say sorry, would you relieve me of strife?
Though I’ve tried and tried, it all turned to lies
I sat and watched as my life passed me by
If I was to say sorry, could I do it all again?
If I was to say sorry, would I be free from my sin?
My regret, can’t forget the pain of the past
All these years have caught up with me so fast
Misery and Pain, Losing all control, Living in Vein, Life without a soul
Didn’t have time to think, Didn’t have time to care
Never wanted to blame myself, thinking life was so unfair
If I was to change my ways, try to learn from my mistakes
Would anything really change for me, or is it just too late?
If I was to admit, that this life was all my fault
Could I change my destiny and live the life that I sought
(Source: http)
Staring out into the distance, I think of what could be
Is there a point to all this madness, what’s our destiny?
Normal life seems so strange, it’s the same thing everyday
People don’t even notice, when their dreams start to fade
Conforming to a system, that’s designed for us to fail
People that are remembered, have paved their own trail
Being pushed out for having our own morals and beliefs
Instead of believing all the bullshit, let others be deceived
I remember in my past, when the future looked so bright
That time is behind me now and I still try to do things right
Even though I expected to have all the fortune and the fame
If I had to do it all again, I think it would turn out the same
Regrets are part of life, we must learn from our mistakes
Even though we want it all, there must be give and take
Shit happens for some reason, many just think it’s fate
It either makes your life or destroys you with hate
(Source: http)
All the pain and the shame that the drugs represent
Falling and Crawling into a fucked up life of descent
Cracked up, Smacked up, you have no will to fight
Don’t care, if it’s fair, this shit takes over your life
Get clean for the dream, then it all just falls apart
Fucking junkie so unlucky, right back to the start
Rip a hole in your soul, for a life that can’t exist
One more hit, shoot more shit, no way to resist
Sobriety keeps calling, but you keep falling
Into the pain, to the needle your chained
It only takes time,till the drugs make you blind
It’s a habit again, say goodbye to your friends
Nobody cares, a junkies life is despair
Don’t be mislead cause your already dead
One last fall, you fucking junkie
Why can’t you see
One last fall, you fucking junkie
What has happened to me?
One last fall, you fucking junkie
You new all the risks
One last fall, you fucking junkie
You won’t even be missed
There was a time in my life
I cared about what other thought
Choices in life were centered around
Pleasing everybody but myself
I knew what I wanted, but it didn’t make sense
People were always telling me I had to change
I gave into their shit, and started living a lie
My values were compromised
Everyone was happy, except for me
My life turned to misery
I stopped caring about what people thought
I told everyone to just fuck off
This is my life, I won’t compromise
I’m sick of living for someone else
Now I am free, I’ve got to be me
I’ve got my life and my morality
I no longer care, or live with despair
Fuck you, if you don’t think it’s fair
This is my life, you have no right
Stop trying to make me change
I tried it your way, felt nothing but shame
I’m sick of the heart ache and pain
Looking back I can’t believe the life I’ve left behind
Expectations and the goals I set quickly changed with time
The life I planned differs from the life I lived,everything has changed
The hardest thing to except, is I’m the only one to blame
I know where I went wrong, I just can’t explain why
Life seem to hold the answers, all I had to do was try
I let disappointment discourage me, from all that I desired
I lost the will to carry on, my life is uninspired
It’s been so long and I fallen so far, I’m no longer in control
I’ve stared into the face of death, as it ripped into my soul
I climbed back up just to lose again, will I ever reach my goal?
I don’t know how to ask for help, I’ll just let my life unfold
Desire and drive, a passion for life, who can predict their fate?
The more shit life throws at you,the more you can relate
Everyone’s there to give advice and let you know the deal
Until they lose everything, they”ll never know how it feels
Tell me what it takes to be happy, I’ve heard it all before
Give me the skills to cope and I’ll destroy my life some more
The harder I try to live life right, the more it knocks me down
My soul was lost years ago, just bury me in the ground
(Source: http)
Everyday this artistic wall keeps building up, brick by brick
I can’t seem to knock it down, but it’s something I want to fix
Searching my mind for the answers, pushing on day by day
The harder I try to overcome this shit, the farther I stray
Can’t write, can’t draw, can’t even seem to play
I keep feeling more useless with every passing day
Tell me what’s going on, is there a reason for this state?
Is there another answer that I need to contemplate?
All I can remember is my creative dreams where driven by strife
It’s the only road I’ve ever taken, It all that I’ve craved from this life
I knew the road ahead of me wasn’t paved with much success
I knew I had to express the talents which from God I was blessed
It seems my time is now consumed, with all the sorrow and the pain
I barely have the will to go on, every minute I’m being drained
Maybe someday I’ll wake up, and these feelings will have passed
Somewhere there has got to be the answer, to fulfill my dreams at last
O.k, let me just start out by saying that these are just a couple of ideas that I use when trying to write poetry. I don’t use any of these ideas with every poem all of the time, in fact most are just techniques I started to do when I got all caught up on being “Mr. Perfect!!!”
I find a lot of the time I am trying to push my writing(like now). I have a small idea and I try to make it into a masterpiece!!! My favorite time to write, is when I have nothing going on in my head(which lately has been happening a lot more) and all of the sudden this great idea appears out of no where. This rarely happens, but when it does….it is MAGICAL!!!! The poem or Blog almost writes itself. My biggest problem with this, is that I don’t know where to end it. I’ll have this great poem or story and then I try to fatten it up with a bunch of jibber-jabber.
I would say that probably 75-85% of my poetry is one great verse. Then I start to fluff it up by using one of the techniques I am about to show you. Hell, sometimes all I have is the tittle, which means that the whole piece is fluff!! It’s all about how you want the piece to be. I mean is it a poem that tells a story, does it rhyme, and how does it rhyme? Is every line gonna rhyme with the next or is it every other line? If you want, you can even have the words rhyme within the same line. Or maybe just the last line in every or every other verse. The choices are unlimited!!! I think the thing that took me the longest to figure out was, this is “MY” poem, and I can write it how ever I want!!!! Unless of coarse it is an assignment or for some contest, but that is a whole different scenario anyways, if that is what you are into, then that is awesome!!!! Just make sure that the end result is for you and not someone else.
Some people are born with the talent to write and then others have to work their whole lives for it and still never grasp how to write. I was one of the lucky ones, I guess. Writing to me was second nature, well, that is until I tried to force it. Then I dried up and stopped writing all together, but that too has passed(I hope). Well, look… all this rambling an nothing about how to write, maybe it was all a lie and I have no technique!!!! AHAHAHAHA, it’s all just a way to get people to read my blogs!!!! AHAHAHAHA. O.K., seriously now, I will get down to business.
My first technique has to do with rhyming. When I get stuck on a word and I want to find something to rhyme it with, I just start with the first letter of the alphabet and work down. Lets take the word “PAIN” (my favorite word, I even have it tattooed on my right forearm{I’m not even joking, “SORROW” is on the other arm, but this isn’t a blog about tattoos..so I digress}) for instance. I take the word “PAIN” and start at the top. “A” doesn’t work, so I move on to “B” bane, doesn’t work either, but “Brain” might, or even “Blame.” What’s the reason I have all this pain…In my brain? Obviously, you are the only one to “Blame!!”
Then you can keep going, if you are satisfied with “B” then move on to “C.” Your the only one to blame, you tied me up, I can’t break your “Chains.” Then you can move on to “D” I can’t break these chains, my love was drained.
So then you generally want to skip A,E,I,O,U, but not always, like I said, this is your poem, if it works then use it!!! So next comes “F.” Maybe you want to do it every other line(this is all off of the top of my head, so bare with me!!) My love for you was drained, I no longer have a soul, Consumed by your flames, Into the darkness, Paradise will never be the same.
O.K., see, I skipped around. I mainly only use this technique when I get stuck. Most of the time, I try to rely on the feeling of the poem or story to carry me through. That of coarse was just a simple example, but I think I made my point. It is all about context and content. Don’t rely on some trick to make you think you are some great writer all of the sudden. Everyone(including me) wants the easy solution to everything. Just because it works, doesn’t mean it will always work!!! Every poem must start with a feeling or good idea.
I must be honest though, and tell you, I really have a hard time reading poetry, because to me it is just a bunch of words put together. I know it sounds bad, but it is true. Don’t get me wrong, words mean everything to me and that is what really captured my heart about music. I just have a hard time reading other people’s writings. I just think that in order to really understand the feelings and soul of the writer, they must be the one to read it!!!! That is why, when you find that one great song that just speaks right to you, nothing is better. It lets you know that there are other people out there that are going through your pain and feeling the same way that you do. Sometimes, they might even help you to pull through it or understand why things are the way they are.
My next biggest tip happens when you get stuck on a word and you’ve gone through the whole alphabet and have come up with nothing!! My favorite thing about words is that there are so many words that mean the same thing. Take the sentence, “I’m riding in my car.” That can be switched so many ways “Traveling in my car”, “Driving in my car” just plain “we were in my car” and so on. Most of the time, if I can’t find something to rhyme, I’ll just go back and change the last word, so Instead of “Driving in my car” I’ll say, “In my car we were riding” so now, I can go through the alphabet and try to find something to rhyme with “Riding” or maybe I’ll leave “Car” out completely, “We were cruising along just the other day”, so see, the possibilities are endless!!
My last tip, is probably the best tip of all and the simplest!!! If you are really stuck on something and just not feeling it at all, then stop!!! Don’t give up and DON’T… I REPEAT DON’T throw it away!!!! I know it’s easy to get discouraged and think it completely sucks, which by the way, I have done so many times, it is sickening!!!! But don’t do it!!! Just stop, take a break, maybe take a week, a month or however long it takes!!! I’ve gone back years after starting something and found I had actually written some pretty awesome, a little tweaking and it turned out to be some of my best stuff!!! It might have had a completely different meaning by then, but it still turned out great!!! Whatever you do, don’t throw it away, well unless it really sucks, then it’s O.K. to ditch it!!!! AHAHAHAHA just kidding. The thing is, you started this writing because of an idea or a feeling. So if you give it some time, the idea or feeling might get stronger and the words might just start to flow the next time you sit down and write.
Good luck, I think you can take it from here, just remember that writing is just a way to express your feelings. A way to make a connection with other people that might be going through the same thing you are. Maybe it’s something you’ve already conquered and there is someone out there right now, trying to make it through the same thing. Whatever you do, don’t write because you feel it is what someone else wants!!! I mean, of coarse there will be assignments and stuff, but do them because you want to, not because you have to. Life is all about perspective!!! When I was growing up, I remember everyone always dreaded the writing assignments!!! Not me, I thrived on them!!! Spelling and vocabulary are a different situation all together, my spelling and grammar are horrible, thank GOD FOR SPELLCHECK!!!!! Take it easy, writing can be fun!!! Not to mention a great way to get out bottled up emotions. If it wasn’t for writing, I would probably be in a mental hospital right now!!!!(not that I’m too far off as we speak)
What the fuck do you want from me
I’m not your hired help
Your always coming down on me
Only thinking about yourself